I can hardly believe this myself but nearly four months ago the number of children we have doubled. We went from one beautiful son, to two. Jack, our oldest was no longer our baby, he became a big brother and we had a new baby in the family, little man Linden. I can hardly remember what life was like just four months ago when we only had Jack, it seems like Linden has always been here, he definitely was meant to be a part of our little family. Of course, with Lindens arrival came a lot of change. Going from one little man to two has been amazing and also completely wild!
So now that I have had two for a few months, I’m pretty much an expert, right?! ….. lol not a chance!!
But these are a few of the things I didn’t know and wished I had or have slowly sorted out on my own… I still have sooo much to figure out and I know I will never know it all but…
- You need to leave the house EVERYDAY if you stay home all hell will break loose literally! Not only that but you will go crazy, leave the house for your own sanity.
- Don’t be afraid…you just read number one and are thinking, ‘ya right, I will just pack up the entire house and take my TWO children somewhere just like that, not a problem…’ honestly though, it sounds harder than it is. All you really need to make sure you have are diapers, wipes and food so if you grab those things and get out the door you are good to go. Just do it, don’t be afraid.
- It has been so helpful to pack food for the next day every night. I basically pack a lunch for Jack and I every night that way when I am getting everything together in order to leave the house in the morning I already have food ready to go. It saves a lot of time and gives me a few more minutes to get myself ready. If we end up staying close to home it just makes lunch time that much easier cause everything is ready to go. Being organized ahead of time is key if you want to find some sort of balance amidst the chaos.
- There will be moments when both kids are screaming and you feel like joining in right along with them. It’s okay, some days are going to suck. There are times when my patience has run thin and at the end of the day I feel like the worst mom ever. Try not to beat yourself up though, we all have these moments, whether we have one kid, two kids or ten kids, it happens to the best of us.
- For some reason as soon as Linden came along Jack started to have issues sleeping. This is still happening, not every night but at least once a week. It could be his age but I think it is due to the huge change that just rocked his little world. I have friends whose first kids did the same when number two came along and their kids were different ages than Jack, that’s why I’m thinking it has to do with the change…
- There is even less time for you than there was before. I know, I know you are thinking well, DUH!! But even though I knew this would happen it still shocked me how little time there is for me. I use infinite amounts of dry shampoo these days, Lululemon gear is what I wear even if I am not going to workout and I’m not going to lie, I’ve left the house only to realize as I am driving away that I forgot to brush my teeth!! So gross… it’s hard to remember to do anything for you when you have other people depending on you to remember everything for them. So just realize that every, single mom out there is just like you and that if you get a chance to pee without a little person standing in front of you asking, “what you doing, mommy?” you have won!
- If you are anything like me you will be addicted to caffeine more than you have ever been. I NEED a coffee everyday right now and during days when I have previously been up with both boys I will probably have two. Usually I only finish about half before it turns into an iced coffee all by itself but I need those few sips and I don’t feel guilty about it at ALL! So whether it’s coffee or tea or hell, even if it’s a glass of wine, have it and enjoy it you deserve it big time!
- You can’t be in two places at once even if you are Super Mom! Sometimes things are going to happen that you just can’t control and you can’t feel guilty about it. There will be times when both kids need you at the exact same moment and you are going to have to say no to one in order to help the other in that moment. Does that make you a terrible mom? No, of course not but sometimes making that choice is hard to do.
- You have to do what you feel is best for your kids and your family. There will always be people who have something to say but if you feel good about the decisions you are making that’s all that matters. You know your children better than any other person in this world. You will make the best decisions for them, be confident in that.
- Having the privilege to watch a friendship grow between your kids is so, so special. It literally melts my heart and brings tears to my eyes. It is so adorable and truly the best thing ever. When Linden is crying and Jack goes over and gently touches his head and says, “it’s ok baby, you ok, don’t cry” I want to cry. I love my little guys so much, all of the chaos, tears and laughter they bring to our lives is so, so special. These moments remind me how lucky I am to be a mother to not only one beautiful little man but two…and then Jack will turn around and chuck a ball at Lindens head and I am quickly brought back to our norm, lol!
There is so much that I don’t know or haven’t faced yet. Things will change as the boys grow and I am sure I will find myself wondering what to do?? There will be days when I handle things well and then there will be days when I wonder, “what was I thinking?!” Being a mom is super hard, there is no right way to do anything. As long as I know I am doing the best job that I can, that’s really all I can do. Finding balance while navigating our wild isn’t easy. The only thing I can be certain of is that if your kids know and feel how much you love them, in their eyes you will be the best mom in the whole wide world, and that’s all that really matters…